Hon Speaker, let me start by apologising for my voice. Keeping the ruling party in order has taken its toll. So, it is a good thing that it is the last day today. I will not react to the speech delivered on behalf of the Chief Whip, because I have always thought that farewell speeches should be on a lighter note. I will try and do my best to lift the spirits a bit.
May I say, hon Speaker and members, that it is indeed an honour to stand here again today, at this very podium as a member of the National Assembly, after an absence of 12 years; this time, however, as a member of another, much better party, the most vibrant, exciting, representative and fastest growing party in the country. [Applause.]
Somlomo, ingathi ndibuyel' ekhaya xa ndifika kule Ndlu kwakhona. Abanye abantu namanye amalungu atshintshile; abanye babuyile. Amanye amaqela atshintshile; amanye ahambile. Iqela endandikulo selizibandakanye naba baninzi bakweli cala. Kodwa, umsebenzi usafana nango-1994 ngoba aba baninzi bangapha ababamameli abantu pha phandle ukuba bathini; bavota ngendlela abaxelelwa ngayo eLuthuli, kodwa siza kubalungisa ngeny' imini. (Translation of isiXhosa paragraph follows.)
[Hon Speaker, it's like I am back home when I arrive in this House again. Some people and members have changed; some have come back. Some parties have changed; others have left. My former party has joined the majority on this side. However, the job is still the same as the one in 1994 because the majority on this side does not listen to what the public needs out there; they vote according to the Luthuli instructions, but one day, we will correct them.]
Dit smaak my dat die ou gesegde tog maar waar bly, naamlik, hoewel dinge verander, bly hulle maar steeds dieselfde. Dit is egter uiters verrykend om weer deel van hierdie luisterryke Huis te kan wees. Daar is darem nog 'n hele paar lede wat in 1994 saam met my die eerste paar tre tussen hierdie banke geneem het. Die meeste van hulle is natuurlik nou Ministers, selfs enkeles wat nie daar hoort nie, maar daar is darem nog talle van my ou kamerade wat vasgebyt het en ek is vinnig besig om heelparty nuwe vriendskappe in hierdie Huis te smee.
As deel van die nuwe leierskap van die DA is ons natuurlik ook vasbeslote om die politieke bondgenootskappe nog verder uit te brei. Ons vriende in die opposisie sal maar verlief daarmee moet neem dat hulle mettertyd al hoe nader en miskien om die draai sal moet beweeg as hulle nie by ons wil aansluit nie, want ons gaan daai kant toe beweeg. (Translation of Afrikaans paragraphs follows.)
[It seems to me the old saying that the more things change, the more they stay the same still rings true. It is, however, extremely enriching to be part of this auspicious House once again. After all, there are still a good few members present here who took their first steps with me along these aisles in 1994.
Of course, most of them are Ministers now, even the few who don't really belong there; however, there are after all still many of my old comrades who have persevered and I am rapidly forging quite a few new friendships in this House.
As part of the new leadership of the DA we are of course also determined to expand the political partnerships even further. Our friends in the opposition will have to make peace with the fact that in time to come they will have to move ever so closer and perhaps even around the corner, should they choose not to join us, because we will be moving to that side.]
Seriously, though, isn't it amazing to think that we are already at the end of the third year of the Fourth Parliament and fast heading towards the eighteenth year of our democratic dispensation? It has been my habit for the past seven years in the NCOP to allocate some light-hearted imaginary tasks to a select group of members.
However, my move back to the NA somewhat late in the year has not given me enough time to assess the talents of fellow members properly. So, I will let it stand over until next year for a full report on the assignments envisaged.
Therefore, I give notice that if I am spared to participate in the farewell speeches again next year, I plan to commission a large number of books to be written. The titles of the books will be carefully selected to suit the personalities and the behaviour of the individuals. So, be warned, colleagues. I will be watching you all very, very carefully for the next 12 months to see who makes it onto the highly meritorious list as writers.
While not being properly empowered to refer to any individuals specifically today, I thought I would try to concentrate on the different professions represented here in the House. But that also proved to be a bit difficult because the way politics has been adjusted over the years, one cannot identify professions very easily.
There was a time when, in most Parliaments, the majority of the members were either from the clergy - being pastors, reverends or dominees [ministers] - or lawyers and advocates. These days you find very, very few members of the clergy attracted to politics. But still, many lawyers, like our friend the hon Johnny de Lange over there, and in his absence, the man with the other hat - the longest surviving member, Prokureur [Attorney] Koos van der Merwe.
I thought it fitting to end my delivery this afternoon by sharing with you a small anecdote about a marriage in heaven. It is about an engaged city couple who were on the way to their family in the platteland [rural areas] to get married. Unfortunately, they were involved in an accident and were killed on the way there. They suddenly found themselves at the pearly gates confronted by the receptionist angel. The receptionist angel had forms to fill in, and they said: "Woah, woah, woah! This is now terrible. We didn't think we would be here. But whilst we are here, could you please find out if we could get married here in heaven?"
The receptionist angel said: "Well, I am not sure. I will have to find out; see if I can make arrangements." The angel disappeared. Two days go by, then three days, then nearly a week, then another week, then a month, then two months, and eventually after three months had gone by the receptionist angel came back. By this time the couple had been talking and discussing this proposed marriage in heaven. They said to each other: "What if we are not compatible; what if this marriage is not a happy marriage? We wonder if we would be able to get divorced in heaven."
The angel approached them and said: "I found out. You can get married. You can get married tomorrow." They said: "Woah, woah, woah! Before we go ahead, there is something else that we are worried about. Can we - afterwards - get divorced in heaven?" So, the angel tore her hair from her head, chucked the clipboard and papers on the floor and stamped on them, and said, "What are you doing to me? It took me three months to find a priest in this place. Where do you think I will find a lawyer?" [Laughter.]
Speaker, may I at this juncture thank you and everybody who assisted you in your task to run this House and Parliament. Thank you to all, on behalf of the DA, for the work you do for our democracy and for the time you spent in that regard.
May I wish everybody in this House a very restful period if they so desire. May I end with my very special wish every year to everybody, which is that the wonderful message of Christmas, a message of goodwill among mankind, finds its way into each of your hearts and homes and into the hearts and homes of your loved ones? I thank you. [Applause.]